No, I wasn’t raptured. Didja think I might be on the short list, with my oh-so-pious ways? Thank you for your prayers!
But I guess I may carry more of a pious rep than I’d realized, judging from an email I received this week from a student; maybe he just noticed that I teach a course on religion, gender, and sexuality.
As a matter of policy, I don’t write snarky things about my own students. But I’ve never taught this guy, never even met him, so he’s fair game, just like Facebook creepers and other Internet parasites. Personal details are redacted, of course; I’m not that mean.
My name is [redacted, but Jesus knows!] and I’m currently a sophomore here at Ohio University. Next year, I’ll be taking a year off of school to pursue God’s calling and I’m excited to see how he will use me to further the Great Commission. I’m building a financial and prayer team throughout the country and was wondering if it would be possible for me to meet with you before school is out for about 25 minutes. I’ll answer any questions you have about the area I’ll be going to and more importantly, I’ll be able to share my excitement with you for what God is doing in my life. Please let me know if we can meet and talk about it!
I am not sure whether this would be the Great Commission or the Great Heist. Seriously – he wants money from me? I guess there’s often a fine line between evangelizing and grifting (see: Benny Hinn).
Of course I’m not giving this fellow 25 seconds of my time, never mind 25 minutes – or 25 cents. But I’m still puzzling over how I’m supposed to have questions about the “area” when he doesn’t divulge his destination. Perhaps that’s because it’s in another realm altogether, one bedecked with harps and gossamer wings?
At any rate, it seems unwise to fund him for a whole school year when, as we know, the world is now scheduled to end on October 21.
Patron cat of Kittywampus (1985-2001)
I had a similar experience when a student emailed me the night before the midterm telling me how he was in the library studying (knowing him, fat chance!) and heard the calling of Jesus. So he decided to drop out and become a missionary. Then he suggested that he and I meet to discuss his path to Jesus. I was still very new to the Bible Belt, so I was terrified and didn’t answer the email.
Hi Clarissa – Sorry about the delay in your comment appearing. Your new blog address caught you in the filter.
Not answering is surely the right response. I was tempted to be immature and give him a sarcastic response (“Sure, I’ll meet, but only if the Cult of the Ceiling Cat gets equal time). Instead I forwarded it to my husband and we both got a good laugh out of it.
Sudden conversions are a great way to get out of final exams. I saw a great post by a prof advising his students who were planning to be raptured, chock full of advice like this:
Q: If my instructor is not raptured, is he really fit to judge me?
A: Yes, seeing as you were not raptured, you are still subject to the earthly judgment of the unsaved. If/when you are redeemed, a change of grade form will be automatically processed by heavenly authorities if they decide your grade was unfairly given by one of the damned.
The whole thing is here. Mandatory reading between now and October 21!