Pussy Politics and the Media

From I Can Has Cheezburger? captioned by me, Sungold.

The November 19 issue of Time magazine has an article on “Plastic Surgery below the Belt.” If you’re thinking it’s not a man’s belt, you would be correct. The article is on cosmetic surgery for your girl parts.

It goes without saying that we here at Kittywampus are friend and ally to all pussies. Not to be a simpleton about it, but we pretty much endorse the old nursery rhyme – for felines and human alike:

I love little pussy, her coat is so warm,
And if I don’t hurt her she’ll do me no harm.
So I’ll not pull her tail, nor drive her away,
But pussy and I very gently will play.

To my mind, that motto rules out anything involving a knife. I’m not referring here to pelvic reconstructive surgery intended to repair falling organs or incontinence. The surgeries in question are done solely for cosmetic purposes. The best known of these is labiaplasty, which involves surgically trimming a woman’s inner lips to look symmetrical, tidy, and small. While I think women’s motivations for plastic surgery are much more complex and interesting than feminists sometimes assume, I also think that mutilating one’s potential for sexual pleasure – just to meet some totally artificial beauty ideal – is plain stupid and wrong.

The Time article reports that about 1000 such procedures are performed in the United States each year. If so, that’s not exactly a trend.

What’s more significant: the fact that labiaplasty and similar procedures are now being publicized in a major American newsmagazine, thus introducing a whole new cohort of women to the world of genital insecurity. (Arguably, I’m fueling this fire, too, but let’s be realistic about our relative readerships; Time has a few more subscribers than I do.)

Time definitely skewed the article in favor of the critics of such surgeries, and I’m grateful for that. They quote Leonore Tiefer, a feminist psychologist who is fighting the medicalization of female sexuality on several fronts, including the quest for a “pink Viagra.” They also gave the final word to sexologist Laura Berman, who suggested

the best way to start enjoying your body could be far simpler than surgery: “You may need a new boyfriend.”

That last line points to the article’s major blind spot. Time fails to ask: whence the pressure for a tidy pussy?

Clearly, the usual culprits – Cosmo et al. – are not providing the visuals. Time notes that before-and-after photos can be found on the web; I won’t link to any but if you’re inclined to track some down, you can find key phrases (though mercifully also no links) at The Daily Bedpost.

But why would a gal start googling for photos of a pretty pussy if she weren’t worried about it in the first place? Cosmo might be stirring up insecurities. I only ever read it at the hairdresser’s but in every recent issue I’ve seen, it seems to harp on the new “necessity” of waxing one’s kitty. Which, in turn, leaves every fold exposed. This is why I’m not in favor of Sphinx cats, even though I can warm up to just about every other breed. The feline form looks divine, regardless – but it’s far more fetching when it’s furry and pettable.

Then there are a few guys who regale their female friends and/or girlfriends with their narrow notions of pudendal beauty. I don’t personally know any men in this category but Em and Lo at the Daily Bedpost report on this real gem of a guy, as described by one of their readers:

He said that some vaginas resemble “kebabs” and that a lot of guys are really put off sex when they get a hot girl naked and find that her vagina isn’t as “neat” as they imagined it would be. It made me feel really self-conscious about my own, even though I never have been before.

If any man had ever said that to me, back when I was single, every last friend of mine – and every friend of theirs – would have heard about his sublime douchiness.

But maybe that was back in the day. Maybe young men today have raised their standards. Maybe it’s not just younger men. I live in a pretty sheltered bubble that way, surrounded by men who are progressive, who genuinely like women, and who would never dream up that kebab comparison – and not just because we women would never let them live it down.

So what’s changed? Porn has got to be at the root of this. Where else is there a plethora of images that allow women’s labia to be scrutinized, judged, and found wanting? How else could a young woman feel so worried about her perfectly “normal” adult anatomy that she writes to sex columnists to inquire about surgery? (Em and Lo gave her a very sensible answer that’s worth the read.)

Why are oodles of teenage girls (!) writing to Scarleteen (as Time reports) and expressing a similar self-loathing? By the way, that’s another quibble about the Time article: It’s great that it led off with a reference to Scarleteen, but dispiriting that it didn’t mention the great work Heather Corinna and her associates are doing. Scarleteen has devoted a whole page – currently the first link on their homepage – to debunking the myth of the perfect pussy and advising these girls that they are really and truly lovely and sexy just as they are. Maybe Time was too prissy to link to a page with anatomical line drawings.

Anyway, I blame industrial porn. And frankly, I wonder – of the 1000 or so annual labiaplasties and similar surgeries – how many of them are performed on aspiring porn stars?